Journal Entry: Sometime in Q1 2024, Probably - March? --- I didn't think I used to have a shadow self. I didn't desire to do "evil" or "bad" things. I was *good*. I still am *good*, but there's a shadow there, too. I'm not sure when exactly I noticed it. Maybe it was when I developed *righteous anger*. Anger at seeing men, and the lack of control of their emotions (and women too!), and how it affects the people that I care about. Anger at seeing men, sometimes even knowingly and willingly, use other people as emotional punching bugs. That anger - and the power that it offers - is helpful. Especially righteous anger - anger on behalf of one's self, or one's friends, the kind of *you can't treat my friends that way, you fucking dick* anger - it's powerful. But it's also dangerous. The shadow emerges from the recognized power, the recognized abilities of a self with privilege, status, power, money, time, focus. The shadow sees what it can do with that anger, and time, and focus. It sees how it could manipulate friends into making better choices in men for relationships; it sees how it could use its power - for what, at least, it thinks is *good*. *Manipulating friends for their own benefit is GOOD*, right? No. *Fuck no*, even. One of the worst things we can do to people is to take away their agency, their ability to make their own choices, set their own path. The line between advice, and control and/or manipulation - that's what's called consent. That's what's called asking *do you want advice, or do you want me to listen?* That's called *creating a safe space where you can be called out* if you go too far. So recognize the shadow. Let it be known to your mind; acknowledge it. And then remind it "No. *Sit down.*" So - if you do have a shadow - don't pretend like it doesn't exist. A shadow ignored will still speak its desires; it will disguise itself, and *it* will control *you*. Not overtly, but subtly. Call out the shadow in yourself. And call it out in friends - gently, with careful words, and in the right setting, and with love and kindness.